For the few of you out there who have followed my blog from the very beginning you may recall my second post titled “What do you want to be when you grow up?” in that post I wrote about having to go back to a traditional 8-5 job after nearly 4 years of being on my own and consulting. I wrote about how grateful I was just to be working at a time when so many were not.
Well 1 week ago today I did something that many people would consider crazy at a time like this and voluntarily left gainful employment to go back to the world of freelance and consulting. I made the very best out of the 4 month opportunity I was so very fortunate to have, but knew all along in my heart and mind that it was temporary. I did all that I could to wake up every morning with excitement and optimism. I would get into my car and use a combination of good music along with a short commute as wind to push my sails, only to have that wind completely die off as soon as I walked through the front door of my office building. Certain places are designed to be tolerable day in and day out, while others can only be endured in doses. This company was definitely the latter. One can only live in blind hope for so long, before you forget what you are even hoping for.
Lining up some additional work, procuring other clients and having a couple loyal clients who stayed with me was enough to give my highly anticipated two-week notice. Two weeks that was filled with relief, doubt and anxiety, none of which could negate the fact that this was something I simply had to do. I revisited avenues in my personal life that can be downsized even further and redefined “sacrifice” in other areas and will continue to do so. I would do whatever I had to do, to rediscover joy in what I did.
Within my first week of being back on my own, my flexible schedule allowed me to have friends over for dinner that I have not seen in ages, with music, cooking and conversation in the background that served as a reminder of what life is all about. I find myself smiling at the idea of having to meet a client on a Sunday evening at a Starbucks knowing that Harley, the most beautiful German Shepherd there is can ride shotgun during most of my commutes once again. For those of you out there who have given me guidance and support during this time of my life, I cannot thank you enough! To my dear friends who also happen to be clients, thank you for your patience, loyalty and understanding! As I sit here in my home office, which at the moment is chock full of banker’s boxes and file folders full of work, I realize that no amount of money or false sense of security can ever buy you more time.